SOMETIMES CHURCH IS HARD

—Arianna Freelen

“I sat in a meeting. The discussion was heated. The conversation was heavy. Hearts were burdened. Chests were puffed. Sorrow, pain, arrogance, curiosity, humility, fear, courage, and forgiveness sat together in a single room. As I looked around the church, I just kept thinking— Church is hard.

*Church is hard for the person walking through the doors, afraid of judgment.
*Church is hard for the pastor’s family, under the microscope of an entire body.
*Church is hard for the prodigal soul returning home, broken and battered by the world.
*Church is hard for the girl who looks like she has it all together, but doesn’t.
*Church is hard for the couple who fought the entire ride to the worship service.
*Church is hard for the single mom, surrounded by couples holding hands, and seemingly perfect families.
*Church is hard for the widow and widower with no invitation to lunch after service.
*Church is hard for the deacon with an estranged child.
*Church is hard for the pastor who is critically judged by so many.
*Church is hard for the man insecure in his role as a leader.
*Church is hard for the wife who longs to be led by a righteous man.
*Church is hard for the nursery volunteer who desperately longs for a baby to love.
*Church is hard for the single woman and single man, praying God brings them a mate.
*Church is hard for the teenage girl, wearing a scarlet letter, ashamed of her mistakes.
*Church is hard for the sinners.
*Church is hard for me.

It’s hard because on the outside it all looks shiny and perfect. Sunday best in behavior and dress. However, underneath those layers, you find a body of imperfect people, carnal souls, and selfish motives. But, here is the beauty of church— Church isn’t a building, mentality, or expectation— Church is a body.

*Church is a group of sinners, saved by grace, living in fellowship as saints.
*Church is a body of believers bound as brothers and sisters by an eternal love.
*Church is a holy ground where sinners stand as equals before the Throne of Grace.
*Church is a refuge for broken hearts and a training ground for mighty warriors.
*Church is a converging of confrontation and invitation. Where sin is confronted and hearts are invited to seek restoration.
*Church is a lesson in faith and trust.
*Church is a bearer of burdens and a giver of hope.
*Church is a family. A family coming together, setting aside differences, forgetting past sins, rejoicing in the smallest of victories.
*Church, the body, and the circle of sinners-turned-saints, is where He resides, and if we ask, He is faithful to come.

So even on the hard days at worship— the days when I am at odds with a sister. When I’ve fought with my husband because we’re late once again. When I’ve walked in bearing burdens heavier than my heart can handle, yet masking the pain with a smile on my face. When I’ve worn a scarlet letter, under the microscope. When I’ve longed for a baby to hold, or fought tears as the lyrics were sung. When I’ve walked back in, afraid and broken, after walking away. I’ll remember, He has never failed to meet me there. When church is hard, it’s easy to lose sight of what and Who really matters.”