By Jacob Crouch
Complaining is easy. It doesn’t take much effort to lean into that fleshly disposition of negativity. An unfortunate reality is that this often creeps into the church. Something, or often someone, doesn’t live up to our standard and we are quick to grumble and find fault. The sermon is too long or too short. The music is too loud or too soft. More nefariously though, there is a tendency to level the criticism at brothers and sisters within the church. When our felt needs are not met to our satisfaction, there is a grumbling that happens against “those people.” And I must confess that I am guilty as charged. By the Lord’s grace, when these thoughts come, I’m reminded of Paul’s exhortation to the Philippians: “Do all things without grumbling or disputing” (Phil 2:14), and now, when people approach me with those types of complaints, I try to have a Romans 12:18 conversation.
SO FAR AS IT DEPENDS ON YOU
Paul addresses the Romans who are having some disputes, and he starts with this glorious phrase: “so far as it depends on you” (Rom 12:18). In other words, he deflects the attention away from “those people” and shines the light on “you”. Paul knows that focusing on “those people” is a dead end street. You can’t do anything, not really, about anyone else. But do you know who you can affect? YOU! So, “so far as it depends on you,” is the exhortation to focus your attention onto your own actions when seeking the solution that you desire. Sure, “those people” might need to change, but you are the only person you can really direct.
So back to my original conversation, when someone comes to me with a laundry list of perceived needs not being met by the church, I want to ask the question, “So what about you?” Not that I don’t want to listen and even seek to exhort the whole church to be more like Jesus, but when the rubber meets the road, you are the only person you can change. If the church is not reaching out to you like you desire, are you the type of church member that reaches out to a stranger? If you feel that there are cliques, are you the church member eager to include someone into your circle of friends? If people are not encouraging you in the word when you see them, be that person that is quick to say, “Can I show what I’ve been reading lately?” In short, be the church member that you want your church to have! I’m convinced that more can be accomplished by consciously pursuing the things that God calls you to be in the church, than by complaining about what others may be lacking.
I decided to write this post, not because of a complaint I heard, but actually because of some good fruit from friends who are doing this very thing. They moved to a different church and began pouring in and reaching out to those around them. They became good church members! And because of this, I got the privilege of hearing how God is encouraging the saints, and God is adding to that church. So if you are tempted to complain about what you think your church lacks, don’t do it! Let it be said that “so far as it depends on you,” your church is more like Christ, and closer to the ideal that we are all striving for.